I’m Self Employed, And My Boss Is An Idiot

My Boss Is An IdiotMy Boss Is An Idiot!

You would not believe how tough my job is. My boss makes me do absolutely everything!

There is not a minute’s peace for me, as my ‘if you don’t get this done today, you’re out of a job‘ list grows longer day by day. You would think he could take on a few of the items, but no. He is too busy doing what bosses do, which is of course, not bloody much at all.

I would have thought that a meeting with the accountant would have fallen firmly into his fiscal responsibility, but no. I get the culpability of trying to invent the truth and somehow legally trying to make up a believable story and minimise how much money gets taken, or not preferably, from his generous expense account.

And when he had the dumb idea to buy a new car, which he told me he couldn’t afford, like my salary increase, he couldn’t be bothered going himself, and instead had me go to three dealerships, and losing a whole afternoon of productive writing. I told him, ‘hey, it’s me who writes to make the money to pay the bills’, but he wouldn’t listen. So instead of 3,000 words of income earning content, I’ve got some nice brochures for two-litre hatchbacks.

Just last week, I noticed something new. Reminders on my computer calendar that pop up and say, ‘Blog post overdue by 4 hours‘. ‘How dare the bastard do that?’ I don’t recall sharing my calendar, so he might have hacked it. I reckon that must be illegal, somewhere. At the very least, it is an invasion of privacy. What’s Edward Snowden’s email address? Maybe he can help me. This is spying!

But, like us all, I need a job so I don’t complain or make a fuss. I wrote the bloody blog post that was 4 hours overdue and replied to the emails that arrived in my inbox after 11 pm – to keep my job. Like we all do. I even recommended the Toyota over the Mazda hatchback. The dumb stuff we do for a job.

Does anyone recall when a job was simply a task one performed between 9 am and 5 pm, with an hour for lunch? When work did not mean checking for emails over dinner and between glasses of red? When going to bed did not involve setting a mobile phone as an alarm, and of course, while doing so, checking for bloody emails?

My boss is an idiot and a bastard. He has me working every bloody waking minute of my life, and he pays like shit. But he’s probably not dissimilar to your boss huh?

3 thoughts on “I’m Self Employed, And My Boss Is An Idiot”

  1. Well, since I’m self-employed…seriously, if this is a real boss ;), quit. I did have an unbelievable canker for a boss the last ten years at my university and kept waiting for cosmic retribution to hit him (I believe in that, based on experience), but it happened two years after I did quit!

  2. I too am self employed and sympathize with you. People have no idea of the pressures we face, even the office Christmas party is fraught with danger. Last Christmas, I had a little too much sherry and before I knew it, there was a romantic encounter involving the boss’s wife and the office photocopier. Incriminating emails were sent which left me no option but to hand myself my P45. Work then piled up which resulted in me reinstating myself in my old position at half my former salary.
    Hopefully I have now learned my lesson.

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