1. The @ key! Now it has only been since last century that we have been using this key on a minutely, hourly and daily basis, yet it still hides in the most stupid places on any keyboard. On my keyboard it is alt G. How logical is that? Why can’t it just replace the § or < or ¨ keys that never ever need cleaning due to a complete lack of use? Not even God, ooops sorry, I meant Steve Jobs, has got around to fixing this bit of computer stupidity.
2. Tourists who travel in gangs because they can’t stand the foreigners in the exotic destination they have chosen for their holiday. As an Aussie you can read here drunk, beer guzzling, swearing and Lipton tea drinking Aussies on holiday in Bali. I won’t offend other ethnic tourist stereotypes, but I’m sure you have your own pet variety.
3. Geographically challenged Americans. Look, I’m really sorry if I upset you guys with this, but it happens so often that it must be like some kind of contagious disease over there. So once and for all, I live in Switzerland and not Sweden. Switzerland is in the middle of Europe, not Africa. That’s Swaziland. And yes, it’s a different time here. All the time. And yes, I come from Australia not Austria. That’s next to Switzerland….oh I give up.
4. Packaging. I call it ‘wrap rage’. Why does everything have to be packaged in a way that requires a chainsaw and a blunt axe to open it? The most annoying is the two part formed plastic enveloping little electrical gadgets. The plastic seems to be made from some alien material that defies our earthly scissors. Marmalade jar screw tops must be next. I mean, only grand mothers eat it and they have no hope of opening the blighter. They have to wait for a grandson with a wrench to visit.
5. Mobile phone contracts. How come they are always longer than you think? Just when you get all excited about getting a newly released model, you discover that your contract was for 250 years and not 18 months as you thought and that you’ll only have to pay a ‘get out of my contract’ penalty of $685.86 plus a new connection fee of $45.00. But hey, why worry, your new phone will only cost you a dollar!
Be warned. Part 3 could become a reality.