20 Things I Would Tell A 20 Year Old

20 Things I Would Tell A 20 Year Old

A young friend, who was about to celebrate her twentieth birthday, asked me this question. “What twenty things would you tell a twenty-year-old about life?” After recovering from the shock of the being asked this question, and knowing that there surely isn’t a twenty-year-old living on this planet who would bother listening to me, I thought, well, why not? After making my decision, my only problem was stopping at twenty. So here we go with my abbreviated list of hard earned life lessons that no twenty-year-old in their right mind will ever pay any attention to. 1. Never listen to anything said by anyone over the age of twenty-one. It

Take Away A Vampire by Derek Haines

Take Away A Vampire by Derek Haines

My Take Away Vampire – A Tasty Novella Although Agatha is over three hundred years old, it certainly doesn’t mean that she can’t adapt and fit into ugly post-industrial small town suburbia. Partial to the delights that an evening at McDonald’s often serve her, she waits at her favourite dimly lit corner table – for her kind of take away. Being your typical urban vampire, this means that her fare isn’t up in bright lights on the menu above the cashiers. However, she usually finds exactly what she is looking for. Her teenage beauty, long blonde hair and ice blue eyes are a temptation very few can resist. After a

Never Write When You’re Drunk

Never Write When You’re Drunk

Writing and drinking don’t mix well. Old King Cole was a merry old soul when I caught up with him after an afternoon in a cheap motel with Little Bo Peep minus her sheep. Although he had to rush back to his counting house quite quickly, he did have time to answer a few of my questions. Yes, he was indeed the king in ‘Sing a Song of Sixpence, but he preferred that it be kept quiet. I pressed him about Jenny Wren but he refused to comment and then angrily stormed off. It was a pity for him that he didn’t notice the commotion going on outside as when

The Wonderful Certainty of Death

The Wonderful Certainty of Death

The Wonderful Certainty of Death Death is so easy, so finite and pure, It has its own wonder and simple allure. Would it take seconds to pass through the gate? To eternal peace, far from life’s hate. I would imagine that once I had travelled this course, From a life taught to cherish, there may be remorse. But what would I miss, the pain of each day? Or the constant reminder that I’m just here to pay. Give me your money! The living shout out, Is this all that life is; I say, ”just about.” Money and greed, and anger and spite, Wouldn’t I rather and unending night. The mailbox