After reading a whole bunch of tech blogs this morning; all getting their rocks off on what new fandangled features will come with the next iPhone due out in a month or so, I thought I’d take a more futuristic look. Guessing what Apple will do in a month or so is too easy. Predicting what they will do in ten years takes much more skill. Alright, here we go with my predictions that I’m sure will prove to be uncannily accurate.
The White iPhone 15 will finally become a true lady’s phone. The back will flip open revealing a handy mirror and compact case. Shiny noses will be a thing of the past.
Not only will the iPhone 15 be equipped with GPS navigation, it will also be used to lock and unlock your car, be your car’s Start (©Microsoft) and stop button, advise you of when it needs servicing, pay your car insurance with one click online payments and operate your electric windows. It will also have a one click service to pay speeding and parking fines on the spot.
The iPhone 15 will be indispensable around the house as it will open doors, close windows, set the defrost cycle for your refrigerator and be programmed as the remote control for all electrical appliances. A small powerful fan located at the base of the phone will finally offer, after waiting for countless models for this promised feature, a hairdryer.
The screen will display both 3D and holograms. This will add a new gesture control in addition to swipe, pinch and tap. Pull out and release will surely be a popular gesture with gamers. I can just see a bunch of Angry Birds being pulled out of the phone by the tail and screaming when released and snapping with a thud back into the screen. That’ll make ’em really angry.
Equipped with the new A6000000000000000 chip, the iPhone 15 will be so fast and powerful, NASA will be able to program launches with just one iPhone. It’s just a pity that NASA won’t have anything to launch.
After years of naming the iPhone with a stupid number, the marketers at Apple will finally have their way. The iPhone 15 will be the first model to carry the new naming protocol. Vegetables. So get ready for the Carrot, Tomato and Parsnip iPhones. Although Apple would not confirm as is their habit, it is believed that Lemon and Turnip will never be used in the new naming protocol.
And at last, the feature we have all be waiting for, for so long will finally be delivered. The nine pin connector will come with an adapter so you can plug your iPhone into your fixed line and end the annoying problems of call drop out. So at long last you will be able to enjoy uninterrupted telephone calls.